I like this picture of a perfectly undamaged orb of glass. Just the foreshadowing of it being shattered into slivers by a Wii remote gets me all tingly.

"Playing tennis on the Wii requires a lot of space. Clearly I didn't have enough space for playing tennis. The Wii remote control is fine, no scratch at all. My friend just lost a game of tennis to his wife. Then he played against the computerplayer - and didn't wanted to lose against it.

My lamp came in the way. Now it looks like a cheap version of the deathstar.." -Claus

I don't want to be too critical of Claus's storytelling abilities, but I could have used more information on how his friends fingers are doing. Surely you can't put your fist through that ball and think you can get away from it without a scratch.

The Danes are continuing the break stuff as is the rest of the world. Today it's their own fingers being damaged. That's right, the nation that reminds American white trash that Copenhagen is more than just a brand of smokeless tobacco, has sent us pictures of a broken lamp and finger.

"I've had my Wii for 3 weeks now. I've been playing just long enough to discover that you can do some cool moves in Wii sports, tennis. High underhand balls, smashes and screw-balls. I was practicing the screw-balls with great empathy and excitement. Suddenly I bang the Wiimote up in my ceiling lamp which is made of glass, and cut my index finger all the way to the bone.

God thanks my girfriend was home when it happened. She's a nurse and managed to stop the bleeding within 20-30 minutes and got my finger stitched back together with some medical staples/strips.

Right now the only regrets and frustrations is caused by the fact that I'll have to wait for my finger to get well enough to start playing again." -David from Denmark

Dave, that sounds dangerous, and I too am glad that your medically affiliated girlfriend was on hand.

The classic thing about this picture is the impressive play by play that steve has written to us. This is something that you can't describe as lengthy or even grammatically correct...

"we were play wii sports the baseball game. my buddy brian is the one in the pic. we were drinking bud light and doin shots of jager. we were a couple hours deep of drinkin. -steve"

"Drinking bud light and doin shots of jager." I don't think I'm exaggerating to say that the world would be a better place if we could just collectively stop combining those two beverages. It should also be mentioned that this is the spiced up version of steve's story. The original email just said "we broke uh lamp."

Lamp Damage:International Vintage. South of the border, down Mexico way we've got some more over eager swingers breaking lamps. They explain...

"Hi guys! Wii were playing (very passionate) tennis in our brand new Wii console, actually wii were just about to start a new game, when my friend Carlos throw out the first ball, and he always like to be very realistic in the game, so in middle of his throwing BANG! BUM! CLASH CRASH!!! the lamp right above him made this horrible sounds and wii all watch the moment in slow motion, then the middle of the lamp begin to fall apart, fortunetly not on him, but on the floor, and over his bed, we have being collecting all the lamp pieces... and 10 minutes later I think we have just found them all. The wiimote has very little damage, and I'm really happy about it... And yes, that was the end of our game time. From Mexico to all the world... wii also have a problem..."

All of this damage from the around the world makes me want to buy the world a Coke or something. It's just so fraternal to think about the human race's collective inability to hang on to a remote.

So back to lamps, this time it's from foreign shores. At least I'm assuming so, because none of my neighbors have ever been named Giovanni.

I bought a wii for my son, and my girlfriend always telling us to be carrefull. last night we played double team tennis and my girlfriend get so excited she take a serve so hard and took the lamp with it. lol it was funny glas everywhere luckely the lcd was not hit. so for all the other woman/girls out there that get the hang of it, look out for your house supply especially lamps that are hangin from ceillings. -Giovanni

Spelling via email is just poor. Dirt poor. I'm going to give Giovanni a pass, because I've already made the assumption that English is not his native tongue, but it does bring to mind everyone else's emails. Punctuation and spelling are just not a part of this sort of communication. I suppose we all make errors, but six exclamation marks behind sentences? I mean c'mon, it's like you're not even trying anymore.

Lamps! Just like Brick Tamland, I love lamp. Anyway, here is just a classy looking lamp broke all to pieces because of the recklessness of some random dude named Kyle.

"I was bowling and doing the famous Fred Flinston tippy toe move and swong my arm to far back and launch the lamp against the wall and broke it -Kyle"

Now some may say that this post isn't "substantial" enough, or it's not "in any way good", but it's got shattered glass because somebody got too excited playing with a toy. That my dearest and best friends is what dreams are made of, or at the very least... a good chunk of my posts.

Holy crap! I think this may be the most gruesome looking submission we've seen yet. I'm just glad you are all here to share it with me. Chad tells us about this event in an even and complacent tone that doesn't bely the full gravity of the wound...

"I was playing Tennis on my brother's Wii - and his house has a ceiling that's a bit lower than I'm used to. Anyways, I was really getting into the game and wanting to act like I would actually act on a tennis court. I was going for an overhand serve and swung my hand up high. The controller hit the ceiling light cover (which was made of glass) and my hand followed through - breaking the cover and having it shatter across my brother's floor. While I was covering up my hand in shock - my brother was just happy to know that his HDTV was still alright. A hospital visit and four stitches later (on a cut that went to the bone) - I'm back on the road of recovery towards playing the Wii again."

The road to recovery is a long and hard one, but I think this brother in Wii has it in him. Soldier on my little Wii player. Just try to do it in a more rational behavioral style.

Here's what happens if you don't take the Christmas lights down ASAP. Karma kids, that's what happens. It was that seemingly simple oversight that started the problems this man was witness to as he tells us...

"A few days after I got a Wii for Xmas, a bunch of friends came to town for New Year's. We turned on the Wii and it was an instant hit. The competition in Tennis was getting pretty fierce when one of the guys got a little too close to the christmas tree and let fly with a strong forehand. There was a delightful POP followed by a shower of glass shards. He luckily escaped injury. Karma was working quickly that evening - not long afterwards I accidentally bonked his girlfriend in the head during a serve, and the next day she whacked him in the elbow during a forehand."

Yes there was a chain of pain that no single person would feel, but instead a never ending stream of party goers would all feel this karmic wrath. Either that or we just have seen what happens when a bunch of drunken party goers start flailing their arms.

What we have here is a traditional Spanish lamp broken by Spaniards themselves. Now you might be trying to tell me that this lamp isn't necessarily a tradition in Spain, but I am going to be way too busy not caring what you say to listen to any of that. Our Spanish friend tells us the story in a brief and hurried fashion...

"In the night of Christmas Eve, we were ready to play some wii-sports with the family. We first try to play tennis, and in the first match my uncle destroyed the lamp during his first attempt to hit the ball. At least it was a paper cheap one. :) Cheers from Spain."

I'm noticing the trend that bowling is for breaking TV's, tennis is for lamps, baseball is for arms, and Zelda for girlfriends that need to remember their place.

I really like this one on a couple of different levels. The first thing is of course this hideous chandelier. It's bad folks. You might think I'm making a hasty judgment based on pictures of shattered glass, but trust my sense of art and interior design. And I've got the same ugly lamp hanging from my ceiling. Our destroyer tells us his story...

"We too, destroyed a piece of fixture finery with our Wii. This gorgeous chandelier was once festooned with six matching mauve glass plates, beveled and rectangular, each and every one. And whilst the three 'candlelight bulbs' and aforementioned appointments were destroyed with one overly zealous tennis serve, causing a shower of glass to cascade around us like a bright rain from the heavens, the dead fruit flies and dust remained curiously untouched, as if they were stuck with a magical glue. Four weeks later and we are still finding fragments and chards. However, not a drop of blood. Yet. -S"

Here's the second part, and it's the better part. This guy made special mention that I use only his first initial and not his full name. I can only assume this is because the world would track him down and do unmentionable things to him? Widespread public embarrassment because you broke a lamp? Who knows? I did honor his request to only refer to him as "S", but that had more to do with the fact that he didn't tell me his name rather than me being nice.